No I'm not actually the city of Baltimore, that's just stupid. I mean if I was the city I'd have a lot more things that I should be doing than playing Counter Strike. You know like policing drug dealers and murderers or picking up the trash on the correct day, or simply starting a recycling program like it was 1990 all over again. Speaking of which, Baltimore, if you're listening, I got a bogus parking ticket the other day. I couldn't have been parked there for more than 5 mins when the fucking Meter Maid whore swooped in like 2008 predatory lending. Also, I was wondering since I get so many damn tickets, can we set up some kind of direct withdrawal? It's a pain in the ass to write out so many checks each month. Well, enough about me, tell me something about yourself.


Yeah, that's interesting....GOOOO OOOONNNN....