First I am not really sure this is the best people I should open up to, but there is some good people I talk with on the server I really hope they on the forums too. I been having hard time sleeping, most people on the server see that since I am on late many times and I posted around 2am this morning on the forums, that is when I woke up. I have spoken with my dad about this, he keeps telling we see a doctor about it sooner or later and I should not take pills for it since taking a few pills now and then will make me a druggie? Really, aspirin we have in the house expired 8/04 I mean me and my dad don't use medicine unless its really needed and I really think this is one of those times just my dad thinks differently about it.

Last week I cleaned the house, not asked too or any thing like that just a day my teacher could not come like today so i decided to clean, kitchen, living room, bathrooms, my dad's den, dining room. So after I did all that, my dad yells at me for not cleaning my own room, but yet I don't get one word of praise for cleaning the rest of the house so what I have a clothes on the floor!! That is not really a big deal, I did most of the house but all I hear is what i did not do. Recently I feel like my dad been not keeping his word with me, and to himself... we been jogging for one since he is worried about his own health since he is getting old and I really find it fun and we always did it together.. now it seems i have to miss half of a week before we a jog together again and I really want to stay with every other day.

I know that should a little selfish and I may be selfish right now. Also last night we could not finish a movie together he promised me we watch the godfather and we only got the first tape of part 1, and then he said we can watch the second tape tonight. I know that part because of his work, he leaves to work, comes home does more work, then we get little time to watch a movie or some thing other times we stay up till 11pm to get breakfast from fastfood. Today my teacher could not come, so I did clean my room, master bathroom, laundry, kitchen, living room. But I went to the kitchen trashcan was over filled, so I had to grab a new bag and stuff it from stuff off of the top into the new bag. Really is it hard to take out the trash bag when its full, I do it most of the time but seems like he cant do it now and then.

Just feels like every is changing really around the house, I watch the news I hear about the layoffs... and I hear my dad rant about work every now and then i worried that he might not have a job.... he told me he take some unpaid days soon but he promised they would not effect Christmas but I really not worried about that I am worried about the jerks at his work. Some of them sound like they setting him up to look like an ass. I know I should't be worrying or any thing like that I dont know just feels like every thing is falling apart today. I just cant wait until I am finish all my cleaning and do little studying, write up current events and play some counter-strike where most of every thing goes ok.