Fold your toilet paper
Crumple your toilet paper into a ball of sorts
Use a corn cob
Freestyle it and use whatever you find
"If BBW's were candy I would have one every day hahahaahha"
"Have you every heard of the dating website plentyoffish.com?? well I check out the website PlentyofWhales.com HAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHA"
"I have a super power called retarded... but i use it sparingly"
Clone
Yeah its call a bedai or how ever the fuck you want to spell it. They got tht shit in parts of europe too. I guess that falls under the freestyle option.
I hope you're joking about the bleeding part. That brings back memories of when I got hemorrhoids from working out with a buddy in college... let me tell you... not fun. I never really appreciated having a non-bleeding asshole until those brutal times.
It's called a "badai toilet." This house has them, my family's house has them, and my mother had them installed back at our old house.