
Originally Posted by
Nemesis
Scribble - Mason Cop – Joker
Scribble! You faggot, you get to play Joker, one of the many mouth breathing cunts we get to put up with today. Joker’s usual game play involves staying around longer than 2 hours before going AFK for the rest of the game, but he does get mod-killed, so there’s something you can relate to. Joker wants to get into Clan, or ULA, or some shit, I don’t know I don’t really care, but either way, he’ll need to catch hackers, which is why he’s Joker, The Town Cop. Get it? Cop? Catch hackers? Ya, fuck you. Oh, and because Joker is too stupid to do anything himself, we gave you a mason partner Starsmine so, you’ve got that going for you.
Abilities: Investigate a player each night to find if they’re town/anti-town
Also you can Night talk with Starsmine, and have gay cyber-sex and all that.
Win condition: Don’t be boring as usual and eliminate any opposition to Town Victory.
Stars - Mason Insane Cop (1 Vest) – Mikey
Stars, you get to play one of the biggest mouth-breathing fucks we have ever had the pleasure of playing Mafia. You are Mikey, The Town Cop. I was thinking about putting in a post restriction where every post had to be at least 5 paragraphs long, but I’m pretty sure I would have just killed myself, kind of like everyone wanted to do when Mikey actually played. Now, we know that Mikey is nowhere near competent enough for rational thought, so we gave you a mason partner Scribble. Let’s see if you faggots can find your way around (Hint: probably not)
Abilities: Investigate a player each night to find out if they’re town-anti-town
Also you can Night talk with Scribble, have fun…fags.
You also have a 1-time, always on, vest.
Win Condition: Try not to annoy me and eliminate any opposition to Town Victory.
Assassin - Sensor – Brett
Whiney McFaggerson! Taking a break from sucking cock to play a little Mafia? Try not to get much jizz on your keyboard. When we rolled for random we had to change your role since you’re fucking terrible at this game, so we can up with something even you shouldn’t fuck up (Hint: You’re gonna fuck it up) You are A Faggot, but seriously, your role is Brett, Town X-shot Sensor. Brett always dies night 1 or is mafia, you’re terrible and die night 1 when you’re mafia. I’m sure there’s a similarity there somewhere, either way, you fucking suck.
Abilities: After a lynch and while nighttime, you may find out how many anti-town players voted in the lynch.
Win Condition: Try not to be as much of a bitch as usual, and eliminate any opposition to Town Victory.
Cyber - Godfather - Rape$$
All Hail Cyber, King of the Faggots! I want to see, just how quickly, you fuck this up. Seriously, you really suck. Anyways, you’re the Godfather, and I was trying to find IBIS’ leader but there isn’t really anyone around here who does anything, so I picked one of the more well-known pole-greasers, you are Rape$$, Mafia Godfather. Your faggot partner is Pass, who is playing Maynard, The Mafia Janitor. We had to beef up your side because Cyber and Pass? Please, easy win for everyone who is not you. Try hard, faggots.
Abilities: You may perform a night kill on anyone (Try not to target yourself, idiot)
Also you may talk ONLY AT NIGHT with your faggot partner.
ALSO, being Godfather, you show up as opposite alignment of what you actually are, or possibly they just get a result of “HUGE FAGGOT” I haven’t decided yet.
Pass - Janitor – Maynard
Pass! Fuck You. You drew the short straw and have to work with Cyber, sorry. Try to just kinda, not associate with him or something. So, with that, you’re Maynard, The Mafia Janitor and Cyber is Rape$$, the Mafia Godfather. Maynard always seems to be cleaning shit up around here so Janitor is somewhat fitting. Plus, he only has a high school diploma so it’s not like he can be anything important. So Cyber has lead on this one. Dear God help you. Also if (and when) Cyber dies, you become a regular goon.
Abilities: Clean up a kill made by the Godfather, meaning the name and role will not show up to town after the night phase. Try to pick the same person between you two retards or you get nothing.
Also you may talk ONLY AT NIGHT with your faggot partner.
Win Condition: Eliminate any and all Opposition, or hold a majority over non-killing town-aligned roles.
Trig - Bus Driver – Phil
Trig, you get to be a Mexican. As a Mexican, you get to drive a vehicle, one which you probably stole. Also, as a Mexican, you’re a criminal (naturally), part of the Mojado Atras cartel. In case you’re too fucking stupid to understand, that makes you Mafia. You are Phil, the Mafia Bus Driver . Your poor and drive a bus, so you’re a regular Mexican, just with a job! Your partner is Rosie, who is Ricochet, The Mafia Roleblocker . Together you are The Mojado Atras! To everyone else just a couple Mexicans. Good Luck.
Abilities: You can switch two people at night. Any actions that were to happen to one, will happen to the other.
Also you may talk with your partner DURING AND ONLY DURING THE DAY. DAY TALK. NO NIGHT TALK
Win Condition: Eliminate any and all Opposition, or hold a majority over non-killing town-aligned roles.
Rosie - Roleblocker – Ricochet
Rosie, you’re probably not gonna live very long so there’s really no point in writing you anything nice, since it’ll be a waste. Can you even read? Speaking of illiteracy, you get to play another Mexican (I think), you are Ricochet, The Mafia Roleblocker. Your partner, in this Mojado Atres Cartel, is Trigger Unhappy, who is fellow Mexican Phil, The Mafia Bus Driver. Boy doesn’t that sound fun?
Abilities: You can target one player at night and stop them from performing actions. Actions still happen to them though…like rape and such.
Also you may talk with your partner DURING AND ONLY DURING THE DAY. DAY TALK. NO NIGHT TALK
Win Condition: Eliminate any and all Opposition, or hold a majority over non-killing town-aligned roles.
Blackmage - Survivor (1 Vest) (PA System) – ZERO
Blackmage, I’ve never liked you, nor the game you played, both of which smell of ham and vomit. Anyways, your role is ZERO The Survivor. Now, I’m sure you’re asking yourself, “Why isn’t ZERO the leader of either the Mafia or Town? Since he started the community.” And the answer to that is a resounding, “Go Fuck Yourself.” ZERO mostly sits around while others do all the work, just like a survivor. You also have a vest, which I imagine as a clan member he holds in front of himself to get stabbed for him. Also, seeing how most of what ZERO does is talk, you’ve been granted a PA System to use at night. You can use it to do whatever you want; talk game, call out Cyber for being a faggot, posting stupid Amine shit, anything. You can post pictures, videos or text, just about anything. The only thing is you can’t pretend to be a mod, other than that go nuts. Just float throughout the game.
Abilities: You have a 1-shot, always on, vest.
You also have access to the PA System. Log on as a user on the forum to use it, and please use it and entertain me?
Username: PA SYSTEM
Password: password
Win Condition: Survive to the end of the game. Once another faction’s win condition is met, and you’re alive, you win along with them.